How could she?
by alwaysoutofreach
Summary: How could she explain to him that the moment Optimus Prime had returned from the dead, from the moment he coughed and sputtered and heaved himself up, she felt drawn to him and longed to be with him forever?
1. To be with him

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing! All rights belong to Hasbro. This is strictly for entertainment, enjoy! **_

_Boom! Flash!_

The crack of thunder startled Mikaela from her sleep. It was pouring outside, just great. She was already in mood as it was, she had been dumped. Sam noticed since Egypt something was different in her.

She wasn't the same around him, her eyes didn't quite hold the same sparkle they once held when she gazed into his. They were no longer filled with love, or adoration, or any emotion for him really.

Instead they seemed distant, and far away. As if she was thinking of something, or rather of someone. She had become distant and far away from him, receding into a shell. Their hugs were awkward, she seemed to shy away from his touch, as if the thought of letting his skin linger on her's a moment longer was repulsive.

Of course…she should have known that Sam would think she was cheating on him. She was after all stunningly beautiful, with chocolate brown hair that fell down past her shoulders, dazzling green eyes, and well-tanned skin. Though she knew this was coming, she did nothing to stop it.

Even when Sam confronted her about it, screaming like a child who'd had his favorite toy taken from him, she did nothing to stop it. She simply stood, listened to his theory about her cheating on him, and continued to take every hurtful insult spilling from his lips in silence. When it was over he told her to leave.

She simply replied with a curt nod, and a small whisper, "Okay." So she hurried out the door, past Bumblebee who whirled in sadness at her leave…of possibly forever.

It wasn't that she no longer loved Sam that she let it happen…it was because she stopped feeling for him entirely. She felt nothing, not even the love of a friendship for him. It was like asking a stranger if they loved you. The answer would be no, of course not! How could you love someone you didn't know?!

That's how it felt to Mikaela, it felt like being asked if she loved a stranger. But as she rose to sit up in her bed in the darkness, she thought, how could she explain it to Sam? How could she explain to him that the moment Optimus Prime had returned from the dead, from the moment he coughed and sputtered and heaved himself up, she felt drawn to him and longed to be with him forever?


	2. Surely not

_Boom! Crack!_

The thunder was so loud it jarred Optimus from his recharge, with a sigh he transformed into his bipedal form. He walked as quietly as he could outside, so he would not wake the other bots. Primus knows they needed their rest; nearly all were still reeling from Egypt.

No matter how many times they fought the tension of battle still lingered long after it was over. It was the cause of many charge frights, paranoia, and restless nights. Tonight was one of the many restless nights.

Not because of the charge frights, paranoia, restlessness, or even the crack of thunder. No, Optimus woke because his Spark was seized in pain. It had been ever since the day of his return from the dead.

"_Optimus Prime." A voice spoke._

"_You have dedicated your life to the protection of others. We send you back not only for you to continue your protection of others, but also to at last be with your mate. War has kept you from finding happiness with another…so we have chosen her for you. Time is running short; the boy will soon awaken you. We ask one thing in return…do not judge whom we have chosen as your mate. We know all that ever was and ever will be. It is time. Goodbye, Optimus Prime. May you at last find happiness." _

From when he woke he suspected who his mate was. No, it couldn't be. Surely not, surely this was a cruel joke. Of all the femme in the stars. Surely it wasn't _her._

As he stood in the rain, his Spark gave a painful tug as if willing him, _begging him_, to find her. There was no use in denying it any longer. The mate the Primes had chosen for him, was one Mikaela Banes.


	3. Lost in thought

_Tug…tug…tug! Tug! Tug! _Went Mikaela's heart. With a sigh she set down her wrench, walked away from the car she was working on, and towards the bench to rest for a while. The tugging at her heart had been constant, and relentless. Most of all it was painful, not quite in the physical sense, but in the emotional sense. The feeling was similar to that of being away from home for a long time; it was ache of something's absence. The ache of someone's absence. Optimus Prime to be exact.

_This is insane. I can't miss him. I hardly even know him. I've only ever spoken to him a handful of times._

Yet her heart continued its tugging, as if _begging her to go to him._ The night wasn't any better, if anything it was _worse!_ She had woken soaked in sweat with an ache between her legs. Absolutely nothing would relieve the ache. Her own hands did nothing for her; she achieved release, and was sated _for a while_. Later on during the night the ache returned, the ache was even worse than before. Self-love was useless for once.

Then there was the matter of Optimus, she missed him, desperately. She knew where he was, though she couldn't bring herself to drive out to the abandoned warehouse they were stationed at.

With the incident of Egypt most of the Autobots were relocated. Most were scattered across the world should there be remaining Decepticons within the far corners of the earth. Most of the original bots still remained in the town. Bumblebee, Ratchet, Ironhide, and Optimus remained to keep watch over Sam's family and Mikaela.

Bumblebee still visited from time to time to give her a ride home at night, and to small talk. She asked simple questions "How are you? How's everyone else? Are you all doing okay," though she desperately wanted to she never asked about Optimus. She couldn't ask. What would Bumblebee think about her sudden interest in his leader? They had hardly ever spoken before. Deciding to avoid raising suspicion she didn't ask.

So here she was, laying on the bench, staring at the ceiling, lost in thought of Optimus, with the tugging in her heart intensifying.

_Tug…tug…tug._


	4. A Spark to Spark talk

_Tug…tug…tug! Tug! Tug!_

The tugging grew more and more insistent with every day. Optimus was nearly being driven mad! From the restless nights, arousal, and constant tugging at his Spark he couldn't take it anymore. This was _madness_. There was absolutely no way. This should _not be happening_.

His own body was betraying him, driven by need to become one with its mate, and to complete the bond. Primus! It never stopped! He'd tried to relieve some of the nightly arousal, but none helped, it only made matters _worse_. It was bad enough that Ratchet could smell the pheromones in the air. He'd tried to brush off the looks he would receive from the medical officer, but every time he passed by mech, Ratchet gave him a slight tilt of the head. To avoid questioning he excused himself and left for a drive, hoping to relieve the ache in his Spark.

On this rather unfortunate day, he was too slow to leave the warehouse.

"Prime." Ratchet called, still facing a corner lost in work. His voice stopped Optimus in his tracks.

"Yes?"

"I believe I need to speak with you."

With a sigh Optimus backed up from the exit, and transformed to his bipedal form. He walked slowly to the corner Ratchet's work station was, and silently dreaded the undeniable conversation ahead.

"Your pheromone levels have been higher than usual lately…unusually so. They are similar to that of a Cybertronian preparing to mate for the first time." Though speaking about mating, Ratchet maintained a straight face, and continued working as though nothing was wrong. The silence stretched on.

"Is there something I should know Optimus?"

With a sigh he confessed, "I am bonded."

"To who?!" Ratchet swung to face his leader. "Primes knows all you ever think about is work! Who is the femme?"

"Mikaela Banes."

"_Optimus_! That is unnatural! Your strength and size alone would kill her! This is madness! You're joking aren't you?"

"It appears not old friend. It was declared so…"

"By who?!"

"The Primes."

"…What did they say when you were offlined?"

"They said 'war had kept me from finding a mate so they had chosen one for me'."

Ratchet scoffed, "Impossible! You are Cybertronian! She is human! You couldn't possibly mate in your natural size, you would _kill her_."

Optimus stared into the distance then answered "Yes…I am aware."

Ratchet heaved a sigh, "How long have you been bonded?"

"Since my return."

Ratchet nodded, brows drawn deeply in thought. "We cannot let this continue. You must mate."

Optimus scoffed, "You yourself said I would kill her!"

"Yes but you forget, we can manifest our holoforms…besides you know well what would happen should you not be able to complete the bond..."

Optimus and Ratchet repressed a shudder. Both knew the fate of Cybertronians who had failed to complete their bond. It was rare, but it did happen every so often, they would fail to mate, and would be driven stark raving mad. If it was not completed within a year or so, the Cybertronians would be driven mad, Sparks broken from calling out only to have no reply. There was no way to explain it…it simply…_happened_. There were two stages to a bond. The first was imprinting, some were at first sight, others were not, it all worked differently with different Cybertronians. The second was mating, this would completely the bond.

"You must go to her." Ratchet urged.

"What should I propose to her? She must mate with me willing or not should she not wish to be driven mad?!" Optimus demanded.

"NO! Primus no! Its been nearly a month since Egypt? That would give you around another eleven months. Woo her! Romance her! Do human like things with her! Get to know her a bit more, fall in love."

Optimus heaved a sigh, and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"How do you suppose I would know what a human outing is?" Optimus called when he stood near the exit.

Ratchet shrugged, "Google it." As he began to turn back to his work station he called out "I think you should go now! You've got eleven months to get her! Time is ticking!" Ratchet laughed at the thought, _his Prime, romancing a human?! Going out on dates?! Ha! He would pay to see that!_

Optimus heaved a sigh, and transformed_, may as well get to it_. He grumbled inwardly, though he'd be lying if he said his Spark didn't skip a beat at the thought of bonding with Mikaela.


	5. I need a hero

**Hello my readers! I'm so sorry I have remained silent! I'm pretty shy, and have pretty bad anxiety so I don't usually know what to write, but I think a bit of writing could be put here to explain chapter four. As you may have noticed Ratchet said "Google it." I put that there because in the first Transformers movie, Optimus said they learned earth's languages on the world wide web. So with that, it would make sense if they Googled something every once and a while. So! As usual I own nothing, and would like to thank you for reading, and your kind reviews! Now…on with the story!**

The music in the club boomed so loudly it made the building shake and vibrate with the beat, strobe lights were shifting around the room. All around Mikaela people were dancing in time with the beat…well _sort of_ dancing. The "dancing," mainly involved bumping, grinding, jumping around, and moving arms around at random. Most of the people in here didn't even know how to_ actually_ dance…_would Optimus know how to dance?_ She shook the thought away with a shake of her head.

_Tug…tug…tug!_

It never stopped; the ache in her chest had grown more and more persistent with every passing day. At the end of the month she'd decided she'd had enough, needing a distraction she headed for the nearest club in town.

So here she was currently bouncing on the dance floor, in a black dress that clung to her figure, wearing elegant black high heels, and pressed against a man around mid-twenties that reeked of beer and smoke. She hadn't meant to come here looking for someone, she came looking for loud music to drown out the constant tugging at her heart. Midway through her dance a man with dirty blonde hair, and green eyes wondered his way over to her, and this was where she was at the moment. Pressed up against a stranger, with the tugging in her heart intensifying.

_Tug…TUG…TUG!_

"Can I buy you a drink?!" The man shouted over the roar of music.

"Yeah!"

As they turned to head to the bar she stepped away from him, "I'll be right back!" With that she hurried off in search of the restroom. She pushed the door open, set her purse on the sink's counter, splashed some water on her face, and looked in the mirror. _What am I doing?_ There were slight bags under her eyes from restless nights, her skin had a thin sheen of sweat from dancing, and her make-up was running from the sweat and water on her skin. She heaved a sigh as she grabbed a paper towel to wipe the sweat and water away, trying to make herself look as presentable as possible.

Once that was done, she headed back out to the bar. The blonde haired man was waiting for her with a glass in his hand for her. "One Bloody Mary for the lady," he said as he handed her the drink and she took a seat on a bar stool next to him.

"Thanks," she said before taking drink.

"So! Haven't seen you here before? What brings you in?"

"…Just looking for a distraction I guess…"

"Oh! Boyfriend break-up with you?" He asked with a grin.

"…Something like that." She answered with a shake of her head as she finished the drink, and looked down.

"Well…_that i_s an absolute shame," he grasped her chin and tilted her head forcing her to look at him "because you are absolutely _ravishing."_

Her skin began to crawl and her heart began to tug even harder than before.

_TUG! TUG! TUG! TUG! TUG!_

Every instinct was screaming for her to get out of there.

"Do you wanna get out of here?" he asked, his gaze sliding up her body.

"I'm sorry; I think you've got the wrong idea." She said as she grabbed her purse off the counter and hurried away to the exit.

As she pushed the door open her world began to tilt. She walked as quickly as she could down the street hoping to find Bumblebee. All the while the world around her started to tilt even more.

_Click, click, click._

She heard the sound of foot steeps approaching. Someone grasped her arm and jerked her back.

A familiar voice sounded in her ear, _"Where do you think you're going gorgeous?"_

The man from the club.

He began to drag her away. _NO! _She began to scream. "_Shut up you stupid bitch!" _ He yelled, and slapped her, it was enough to send her to the ground, and he hastily picked her up. Through her delirium she remembered the pepper spray she put in her purse just in case she ever needed protection. This by all means qualified. She dug in her purse, shook the pepper spray, and aimed it at his eyes. He was quicker, he knocked it out of her hand, and this caused him to drop her. She pulled herself up and stumbled, trying to run away.

A hard jerk on her hair caused her to cry out. He pulled her into a dark alley, and pushed her to the ground. He pulled her legs apart and settled between them, the drug she was given began to kick in, her limbs felt heavy, she couldn't find the strength to fight back. She began to cry, "_Please don't do this." _She sobbed as he began to pull her panties down. "_Shut up," _he growled and yanked on her hair causing pain to tear at her scalp, he pushed her dress up over her hips, making her sob even harder. "_I'll make you scream for me baby," _he whispered in her ear as he spread her legs further apart.

She waited for the pain…but it never came. Instead something lifted the man away, through her delirium she could hear punches hitting their mark and groans. She heard footsteps approaching; she closed her eyes, and tensed in fear. She opened her eyes and just barely through the darkness could make out a figure of a man. He was taller than the blonde haired man by a few inches; he was dressed casually with a black shirt, dark jeans, and brown combat boots. He had jet black hair, and vibrant blue eyes…that for some reason looked strangely familiar.

He bent down to her and pulled her dress back down over her hips. Sleep was pulling at her, but she fought to stay awake. He slipped one hand behind the back of her knees and the other behind her back, picking her up bridal style, more tears fell from her eyes. The man took notice and gently wiped them away with his thumb. As he began to walk away with her in his arms a familiar baritone voice whispered in her ear, "Its alright Mikaela…I've got you…I've got you."

"Optimus?" She asked, but before she could get a reply her world was plunged into darkness.


	6. He's gotta be strong

"Optimus?"

She slumped in his arms.

He stopped mid-walk to peer down at her unconscious form. Her eyes were puffy from crying, her make-up was running, her face was red from crying. She was slipping somewhat so he jerked her slightly to get a firmer gasp on her body. As he continued walking he thanked Primus for Bumblebee contacting him when he couldn't find Mikaela at home or at work.

He had been driving through town with a human holoform sitting in the driver's seat so it wouldn't raise suspicion to those who passed by. He was having difficulty locating her from his vehicle form, so he instead opted for searching for her on foot with his human looking holoform. He had just rounded a corner, passing a building that vibrated with music coming from within. When he heard _it. _

Soft sobs, and please to stop. It was_ her_.

He hurried his pace down the side walk and found her. She was laying in an alley with a man leering above her, dress hiked up around her hips, and her legs were spread. Soft sobs and please escaping her parted lips, begging her attacker to _please, please, please _not do this.

_TUG!TUG!TUG!TUG!TUG!_

Anger, furry, and absolute _rage _flooded through his body. _That _was _his mate_ and no one but himself could touch her _that _way. He quickly strode forward and pulled the man up and away from his mate. In the darkness of the alley the man swung wildly. He landed a few punches to Optimus, it would have continued, had Optimus not have grasped his hands and sent a bolt of electricity through him. As the man shook with the electrical charge to his body, Optimus dropped the taser, and the man fell to the floor.

The only reason he had the human device was because Mikaela had forgotten it in his passenger seat one time he had driven her home after Mission city. She was still shaken when it had tumbled from her purse and hadn't noticed it fall into his passenger seat. He found it later when he transformed and it clattered to the ground, he'd kept it tucked in his glove compartment, with intentions of returning it to her one day. He had Googled what it was used for, and found it was technology to be used should one ever need self-defense.

He had intentions of returning it to her tonight when he found her. Though this was before he witnessed her attack. As he continued down the street to his vehicle form he vowed he would protect her from now on. He would take her anywhere she needed to go, and return her safely home. He would use his hologram form to chaperone her anywhere she went. _He_ would be her guardian.

He opened the passenger door of his vehicle form and gently lowered her in. He shut the door and hurried to the driver's seat climbing in. As he began to drive back to the warehouse he drew her closer to him, so that she lay stretched out, with her head resting in his lap.

As he stroked her hair he whispered "I'm here Mikaela…I'm here."

All the while the tugging in his spark waned down to a lazy _tug...tug….tug._


	7. And The Much Awaited Talk

Mikaela danced between reality and darkness. She woke several times, each time to a different scene before her.

She woke once to be laying in her rescuers arms, facing up staring at what seemed to be the roof of a truck.

The second time she woke she heard voices that vaguely sounded like the autobots.

"_She will be alright. A human drug used to sedate. Take her home; make sure she gets some rest. Let the drug pass through her system."_

The third time she woke she felt herself being tucked into bed. A blanket was drawn up to her chest and her shoes were being removed.

By the time morning had come she'd woken to a splitting head ache. Groggily she sat up in bed and massaged her temples to try and relieve the pain. The scent of food wafted from the kitchen down the hall in through the open door of her room. Her stomach rumbled at scent and she dragged herself from the bed.

To her horror she was still wearing the dress from the night before and had no wish to spend another second in it. She shut the door and dashed to the closet whistle hurriedly pulling down the zipper at the back of the dress. She chucked the dress into a corner and pulled on a large t-shirt and pajama bottoms.

She then proceeded to the restroom where she relieved herself and scrubbed the make-up from her face, and hurriedly bushed her teeth.

Finally she began the trek down the hall, when she peered into the kitchen the man from the alley was there. His back was to her as he appeared to be making scrambled eggs and bacon. Quietly slipping inside the kitchen with the stranger she reached for a pan lying on the counter and as quietly as possible came to stand behind the mysterious black haired man.

_Whack!_

She smacked him as hard as she could on the head.

"_Ow!_" The voice that emitted sounded strangely like the autobot leader, but…_there's no way. It can't be Optimus. Can it?_

The man shut the stove off, grasped the back of his head and turned to face her, and she could have sworn his eyes were the exact same shade of blue Optimus' optics were.

"What was that for?" The familiar baritone voice of Optimus Prime questioned her gently.

_Oh shit…_she, Mikaela Banes had just struck the leader of the autobots on the head with a frying pan.

"_Optimus?" _She dropped the frying pan and a _clang_ was heard as it hit the ground though neither of them paid it any attention as they continued their staring at one another.

_TUG!TUG!TUG!_

"Yes." He replied with a nod of his head.

A bubble of emotion welled in her chest and the impact of what had almost taken place last night hit her like a train. _If he hadn't been there… _her eyes watered and a sob escaped her throat.

Optimus held his arms out and she gladly rushed into them. Tears streamed down her face as she clutched at him. He began to rub soothing circles on her back, with the weight of the emotions crashing down on her, her knees buckled and Optimus swept her up into his arms bridal style and lowered himself to sit on the ground.

He held her while she cried and began rocking back and forth.

"Don't leave me…please. Whatever you do, j-just d-don't leave me right now." She whispered in his ear between sobs.

"Shhhh, it's alright. I'm not leaving. I'm here now. You're safe."

With that her sobs began to slow, her breathing evened out and she relaxed in his arms, head tucked underneath his chin. Eventually he broke the comfortable silence that had settled itself between them.

"Perhaps now would be a suitable time to eat? I have made you breakfast."

"You can cook? How?" She questioned as she pulled back to look at him.

He smiled at her. "Google."

* * *

"So…" Mikaela drawled while pushing the last of the scrambled eggs around her plate.

"Yes?"

She set her fork down and crossed her arms on the table.

"I don't mean to offend you or anything, but why do you look human?"

The question caused Optimus to quickly look down at his holoform and a frown passed over his features.

"Ah, a human holoform so not to raise suspicions, I also thought you would prefer a human form. I can change its appearance. Is it not to your liking?"

_Prefer a human form? Since when he become self-conscious about what she wanted him to look like? Something was going on._

"No, it's just…_different_…Can I make a request?"

"Yes." Blue eyes bore into her own.

"Can you look like yourself? It's just a little jarring seeing a human instead of actually seeing _you."_

With a nod his appearance flickered and shifted before her eyes and within seconds she was staring at the familiar form of his Cybertronian body. The sight was downright strange, and the slightest bit humorous. Here he was shrunken down to what looked like the height of six foot five. Casually seated in front of her with his arms in his lap. His metal form looked completely out of place against the wooden chair he was seated in. Yet she was still allured by the strange sight of having the leader of the autobots in front of her.

_TUG!TUG!TUG!_

The annoying sensation returned in her chest once more.

Mikaela heaved a sigh and rubbed her temples. "If I asked you something would you tell me the truth?"

"Yes, I would."

"…What's going on? I don't feel the same, ever since Egypt. I don't feel well. I feel like I'm being driven insane for something I want."

A sigh escaped him as he cast his gaze downward.

"The bond."

"The bond?" She questioned.

"Mikaela," he began cautiously. "What is now happening was not of my doing, but rather the doing of the Primes. Please do not become angry with me."

At this she leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm listening."

"We are bonded."

A scoff escaped her lips, "What do you mean?"

"You have been attracted to me as of late, have you not?"

She shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"I'll take that as a yes. A bond on Cyberton is different than it is here on Earth. On Earth you make a promise to remain loyal to one another, on Cybertron the bond is much deeper than that. We meld our sparks together, through this we share memories, emotions, and love for one another."

"What does that have to do with me?" She questioned raising her eyes to meet his gaze.

"The Primes have deemed you my mate. We share a bond now. This is why you have been feeling unwell. The insentient tugging at your heart, it is a calling through the bond to mate. You see, there are two stages to a bond. The first being imprinting, a sort of love at first sight if you will. It doesn't always happen immediately, seeing as that is our current predicament. The second is mating, this completes the bond."

"_Mate? You want to mate? Of all the others why me?_"

"Mikaela, please understand. I would never force you into something you are not consenting to do. I did not choose you, the Primes did, they have deemed you worthy of being my mate. It was under their actions that we have become bonded."

Mikaela sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "What happens if we don't complete the bond?"

"We will be driving insane."

"How much time do we have before that happens?"

"A year or so."

"And what do you intend to do about it?"

A smile graced his features, "Court you, if you are willing that is."

Mikaela weighed the options in her head. _Date and eventually mate with a Cybertronian or be driven insane?_

Another sigh passed from her lips, "Of course, just let me know with time when you want to go out and do something. You'll be here with me for now on?"

"Yes, I have become your guardian and I will remain with you at all times should you need protection."

"This is gunna be one long year…," she trailed off.

As she rose to take her dish to the sink a thought passed through her head._ There were worse things than being Optimus' mate. After all he would never hurt her._


End file.
